Twelve Red Herrings by Jeffrey ArcherMy rating: 3 of 5 stars
I bought this one a couple of years ago, when the author was in town. I quite enjoyed this book, but expected more of a connection between all the tales than was present. Only one character is repeated in two stories, all the others are disparate. The central conceit for all of them is the 'red herring' and some of the stories are more obvious than others in their deception and cleverness.
"Trial and Error"
Undoubtedly the best of the lot; it's a pity it was placed in the beginning of the book, as it heightens expectations exponentially. The entire premise is drastic, yet never veers towards the ridiculous. The story engages all the feelings of hope, love, betrayal and anger. It's like a condensed version of a Hollywood film, which worked for me. It's written at a measured pace, except for the ending.
The ending was too rushed and didn't allow the reader to thoroughly absorb all the details of the conceit. I was disappointed by that - because I wanted the writer to dwell on it more, to bring out the emotions of all the characters and explain the depths of the deceit to us.
"Cheap at Half The Price"
After the first story, this one felt too light-hearted and pedantic to take seriously. Granted, it's still clever, yet there's not enough of a build up for the twist at the end. I didn't care for the central character Consuela at all, which I think detracted from the entire experience of reading the story.
"Dougie Mortimer's Right Arm"
The jury's out on this one. I'm not sure if I liked it or am indifferent to it. It never quite works hard enough to explain itself - we can all imagine what occurred or led to the circumstances of the story, yet we aren't given enough details to formulate a general hypothesis. I liked the skulduggery in the end, but there was no surprise factor because there wasn't enough to go on. I'd get behind this story a lot more if it cared a little more about the ending.
"Do Not Pass Go"
A rare story about a character not written as white. It's good, not great. Middling, yet interesting and thrilling. The pacing is good especially given the time-bound nature of the events. It's also a hopeful story written with good people at heart. Not sure if the punchlines work, but a good one all the same.
"Chunnel Vision"
I'm in two minds about this one. I like it because it's funny, yet it's cruel. It makes fun of one of its central characters, which he at once deserves, yet seems too far-fetched. We know the outcome almost near the beginning of the story, which did not work in its favour because it ended up feeling overlong and belaboured the point.
I am also not sure this story works out logically. There's no way the writer friend couldn't have known the truth - you'd think he would at least read the news or hear things on the grapevine, given he and the protagonist work in the same industry. Can anyone be that foolish? As I said, far-fetched. Also, are we to intuit that the third character played a hand in all this? Because it doesn't come across, at all.
"Shoeshine Boy"
I want to say something about this story, but it lost me at the get go. I wasn't interested in these characters, and the circumstances seemed even less interesting.
"You'll Never Live to Regret It"
To me, this was one of the cleverest stories in the book. When I reached the deception point, I actually went back and re-read the first half of the story to see how cleverly the author had acted upon our preconceived assumptions. I liked the central conceit of the story, it was cleverly done by both the characters and the author.
There was a point in the story that was deliberately written confusingly, which I'm not sure was the best way to go about things, but it worked for this story.
I'm disappointed that it turned out to be quite dark. The entire book seems to play on the stupidity of people, a device that stops working sooner rather than later. The final punchline falls flat because it's aimed at the wrong character.
One huge thing missing in this story is emotion. Everything centres around the money, but considering there are dead people, young dead people at that, you'd think they would be a little more taken up with their lost loved ones than how to get money. I could be wrong.
"Never Stop on the Motorway"
Fabulously written story with plenty of action. It's a real road thriller that reads more like a Stephen King novel. It has your heart pumping from the start - first due to the frustration you feel for the character, and then later the anguish and fear. There's a sense of urgency throughout and the author never lets up.
The ending, however, felt so rushed that it almost lost the entire point of the story. Had it been written better we might have ably gauged and gawked at the real danger that the character was under. Without that we aren't left with that great an impression.
"Not for Sale"
Honestly, this one was just silly. I wasn't sure where it was going, but any and every story with a young, recently-graduated female character usually reads the same. It was all very obvious, bar the ending which I expected to be darker. At the same time the ending was so ludicrous I couldn't, and still can't, wrap my head around it. It was so contrived that it makes no sense and I couldn't care less. Also, the punchline fails miserably.
"Timeo Danaos"
Another story that couldn't hold my interest. I don't know if it's because the character is also named Ted, but this read as insipid throughout. Thankfully it was quite short.
"An Eye for an Eye"
Good, but not plausible. I liked that we saw the return of Sir Matthew from the first story and that the entire story is an investigative tactic. I like how clever all the characters are, and that their actions are within the purview of their abilities. I would love to go back to see how these people get on with the rest of the story; it was that enjoyable. It's one of the few stories that didn't feel rushed, though I feel one of the beats took too long in coming. Definitely a marvel this one.
"One Man's Meat..."
The last story of the book and probably the strangest, because the reader is given options to choose the ending. Between 'Rare', 'Burnt', 'Overdone' and 'À Point', I think the first and last ones work best. The central premise is again quite ludicrous - our protagonist abandons his evening duties after spotting a gorgeous lady entering the theatre. He then finds himself a seat next to her in the hopes of getting to know her.
'Rare' seemed implausible at first, yet its melancholy ending made perfect sense for the characters' actions. Though it's still confusing that our protagonist is trying to plan his entire life out with this woman he literally just met the day before. It was, however, the best written of the endings.
'Burnt' was all about burning the hapless protagonist, who may have deserved it all, but throughout, this ending felt like a prolonged joke on the protagonist's behalf. You just couldn't take it seriously.
'Overdone' was an unfortunately trope-tower. Nothing in it made sense, except the author's need to punish the protagonist (an action not amiss) and vilify his love interest.
'À Point' is too good to be true and the kind of Disney fairytale ending that a lesser writer would think is his character's birthright. I enjoyed reading this one a lot, however, if only because it was lighthearted and easy to read.
The book is enjoyable and clever throughout, but the majority of the stories are let down by rushed endings, or endings without the proper details or context. Often it felt like the author's thoughts didn't translate to the page, or that the editor felt the missing information led to the ambiguity of the story. It didn't, it just led to flaccid endings and poorly conceived punchlines.
'Twelve Red Herrings' was meant to be great, but couldn't quite get there in the end.
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